Sometimes Being An Adult Really Sucks {Life}

If you're not in the mood to hear a whiny blog post, feel free to move along. I don't have much else to offer this week, since my head is filled with tax returns, and trying to complete college assignments and blog posts from a public library as I sit between middle aged men playing World of War craft.

For anyone that had read my blog on a regular basis, you must have noticed that my blog is mostly on auto-pilot except for a few short posts once or twice a week.  If you haven't noticed my absences that's fine too. I don't need you to miss me. That would only add to my stress and the crushing weight of responsibility.

I've not been in a good place mentally, physically, or otherwise for a long time.  Returning to full time college studies a year ago and working have left me low on patience, energy, and time. If my eyes are open I'm working, or at least thinking about work while I sit in a heap on the couch.  

It's been a tumultuous 3 years for our little family...Job loss times three...Life altering illness...Family deaths and illnesses...College course complications...Forced to move from our home of 13 years for lack of money...

And I've learned to stop saying "Things can't get any worse they can only get better."  Well, no.  Actually there is always room for more disappointment.  Usually I am able to see the bright side of things after I have a good cry or a chance to think about the situation a little more. What has sent me further into a downward spiral?  After returning to work as a supply teacher in February 2012, and eventually working myself into a steady shift, recent staff changes have left me back at the bottom of the roster. On-call.  Two simple words, yet they have sent me reeling into a quiet tumble back to despair. It's hard enough to feed a family of three on my single income- How can I plan on keeping a roof over our head when I don't know my next shift?

With my tax return in hand I would love to blow every last cent on a trip to a quiet beach where I can stick my toes in the warm sand for 7 days. Cold feet- with chronic anaemia it's one of the symptoms that drives me crazy, that and being unable to wear my wedding rings because they turn my skin black.  Every year my tax return goes to bills and the cost of living.  And that is likely the case this year too.  That is why being an adult sometimes sucks.

Comments

monica hayward said…
it does have it's super sucky times doesn't it... and yet when we're young we want to be adults because they have all the fun... and money HA! :)
gibberish said…
Oh, wish I could give you a hug right now. I'm a huge fan of the power of positive thinking. I would never have survived if I hadn't adopted this attitude. I'll think some positive thoughts for you.
Hugs, Julie G.
Amy Dell said…
Thanks for stopping by ladies. I'm so close to graduating, it's still a test of endurance though. Just wishing for a little good luck right now.